The “now” unfolded #Anguish in becoming#

The present is never presence. Once we think to have it in our grip, suddenly we already lost it. It is slimy and elusive. It is in our nature to believe that living the present it is a certain thing, but it isn’t: when you pronounce the word “now”, it is already gone, it’s gone the same word “gone” that it isn’t anymore. Perhaps, with the gone-departure, life follows, leaving the moment to eternity. Our present is our memories, collected into our soul, organized by the spirits and summoned by God, whenever it is needed. Just thinking about the memories, we can live again and again the present which was but now no longer is. 

After centuries of defeats and failures we believe to be invincible still. The “we” who denied its nature, who reject the idea to be born in the dirty cradle and, eventually, full of regrets, the ES who lost its path wanders in the never-ending nothing.

In its doleful existence it can raise. This force is not given to everyone but to the ones able to grasp it. Everybody may catch it but not all able in doing so. The free will is a bequest from God. To the mass, nothing exists aside from itself; for it, all the energies of which God is the greater expression, are due. Instead, this part of humanity, called mass, represents the “primitive” part of it.

Sebastian Münster, (1544)

Confusion is the word. Dizziness and giddiness, deep nausea. The expression of the being able to grasp the main idea is the combination of these disturbs, each of one, representing a particular feature:

1. Dizziness: IT grasps the idea, IT feels its presence into the present and realize that it is into the world among spirits. The head starts turning around and it falls deep down space, into its consciousness. IT becomes aware of itself, by pain and distress.

Xavier Bueno, 1965

2. Giddiness: Suddenly ITS heart starts beating faster, apparently everything is going well even though something behind the consciousness is pushing hard to destabilize the world inside and around IT. There are no alternatives: IT is alone and by suffering IT experiments is position into the world (society). The metaphysical presence of IT among the many is devastating: the spiritual essence of the few is lost surrounded by the nothingness.

Xavier Bueno

3. Nausea?

The presence of the present starts with the unfolding of pain.

Hieronymus Bosch

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